Archive | February, 2014

An Improper Proposition

27 Feb

What the whaa…?
(Courtesy: twistedsifter.com)

While asking a student to read her made-up phone number written on her page, THIS happens:

Me:  EunJi, may I have your phone number?

EunJi:  Ok!  Sex-Sex-Sex, Free Sex Tonight!  Call me ok?

Me:  O.o  *a pause a little bit too long to be ok*  One more time?

EunJi’s partner:  She said 666-3629.

Me:  Oh,…okay!  Thank you EunJi!  Class, please practice saying your numbers to each other.  I will come around and check on your fluency.

 

WOW.

 

Submitted by:  The Big Red Dog

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Color-coded Conspiracies

23 Feb

As teachers, what we wear has a huge impact on our students…
(Courtesy: twistedsifter.com)

“So, today we got a new schedule change for the whole of next week to make up for the snow days. 😦

I gave it to my students and they told me ‘Teacher, this is a conspiracy.  You did this to us, didn’t you?’

Me:  No, I just got it today too.  I don’t like it much either.

Students:  That’s a lie.  Look, the paper is blue and your hijab is blue today too.  This proves that you planned it.

Me:  (O-O)…What the…(-_-)…..

(My students are definitely special.)

Submitted by:  Amma

Kicking It In Jail

19 Feb

Man, didn’t see that coming…
(Courtesy: twistedsifter.com)

Student 1:  Stop kicking me!

Student 2:  Stop kicking me!

Me:  As soon as I turn my back you two get into it.  Stop it.

Student 1:  She kicked me first!

Me:  I said stop it!  Neither of you are innocent.

Student 3:  *raises hand* I am!  I don’t want to go to jail.

Me:  HAHAHAHAHA

Submitted by:  Kim Possible

Sex Education?

15 Feb

 

 

 

 

Student:  “Teacher I want to borrow your boyfriend to make a brown and yellow baby.  I think it’s a very cute baby.”

 

(See the book below, Part 2.)

Untitled

 

 

#SPEECHLESS

Submitted by:  Ambitious Educator

Positively Positive

11 Feb

Not sure if this is always an “optimistic” thing…but we’ll go with it.

I asked my students: “What does optimism mean?”
One of my students: “It means thinking and being positive ALWAYS!”

Nice one! I loved this response!

Submitted by:  Amma

“Just making sure.”

7 Feb

(While I am helping out another student)

Student: “Teacher,

Teacher Amma,

Amma,

teeeeacher!”

Me: “What? … Why?”

Student:  Just making sure.

Me: … seriously?

Submitted by:  Amma

Ugly Representative

3 Feb

funny-gif-Conan-O-Brien-clapping

 

My student tried to bother me today. Too bad, I know something called customer service.

Student:  You know you’re ugly right?
Me: Ya, thanks!
Student: You know that I hate you right?
Me: Yep! That’s great.

(Student gives up and apologizes later)

(Courtesy: twistedsifter.com)

 

Submitted by:  Amma